Today, I had been filled with sermons telling me to REST. The entire November was filled with such toil and trouble that I was actually already wondering if I was a member of the cast of Macbeth or something.. "Double double, toil and trouble..."
I decided not to go to church and just have my own service in my room, again. No use wasting energy getting on a jeepney and seeing energy-drainin' scenarios and energy-drainin' pplz. Heheh.
Uncannily enough, I chose Pastor Joey Bonifacio's "Curse of Restlessness" for my "Sunday Sermon." The title was just intriguing, and I just thought it would be a fun thing to listen to for my "Seriously Sabbath Sunday."
And you know what it was all about? Entering God's REST.
There is a reason why God had created us on the Sixth day, and Adam woke up to fellowship with Him on the 7th day. Pastor Joey said that this is because God did not want us to see Him working. God's priority is that we be able to walk with Him and enjoy His presence, as well as His creation with Him.
From that sermon, I realized that the constant running around and the mentality of "Busybusybusybusybusy," is not a blessing; rather it is a curse: the same curse that God had put on Cain when he committed the first murder: Restlessness.
After this sermon, I had decided to also listen to renowned prophet, pastor, teacher and writer Rick Joyner's "Entering God's Rest." Same thing. We need to rest. Same thing: God did not create TOIL. In fact, it is a curse. But God DID create LABOR, and LABOR is supposed to be enjoyable. Work is supposed to be enjoyable and holy.
After I listened to those sermons, I went, "WHOA!"
So for all those 8 weeks of grueling torture under toil, where I was actually being an idiot, running around like Alice in Wonderland's White Rabbit, I was, in reality, under a "Curse of Restlessness."
Most people would deem me crazy/idiotic/stupid for letting go of a client that had allowed me to neutralize a big chunk off my current debt. You know what, the day after I let go, and I decided to fully rest, and the depression dissipated, I FELT SO MUCH BETTER.
I let go of that client because things were already emotionally maddening. There was deception and power-playing involved, manipulation, so much strife, and it was no longer a healthy situation. My emotional makeup was absolutely shot: I hated them, I hated all work, even for the clients I've been with for a while, and even those that I had struck a great rapport with.
I had never made a better decision in my life.
After listening to this sermon, and searching for Jewish Superstar Emmy Rossum of Phantom of the Opera's SLOW ME DOWN, I finally got it.
After "my own service" at home, cooking lunch for meh and enjoying it with God in a lazy, quiet, Sunday, I went off to my boarding house's subdivision playground. I had always told God, whenever I passed by that playground, that I'd like to be on the swing at one point in my existence...
I got what I wanted yesterday. :)
I was swinging high up in the air and just being in general glee like a 5-year-old. I didn't realize that you could actually swing without anyone pushing you. Hey, I was experiencing powerful swings, and major gusts of swinging-induced air that allowed my hair to flap behind me! I was... In bliss. :D
I felt like God was pushing the swing for me, as I listened to rockin' Christian prophetic worship songs. If I knew what flying was like, swinging would most likely be just like flyin'!
So from this point on, I's swearin': Two days off fer meh after grueling seasons of work, and at least once a day of REEEEEST. It says in the Bible that we have SIX days to do our work. I might as well enjoy my Sunday Sabbaths. :D
And you, workaholic human, next Sunday, YOU TAKE A REST TOO!
There is no arguing with the fact that there is a dearth of Godly entertainment in our midst today. We Christians are tired of the filth that imposes their twisted values on us, and we are crying out to reclaim the senses deadened by the widespread media philosophy of appealing to our basest of human desires.
If you are like me, looking for good, wholesome entertainment that allows your heart to be softened, to be all the more in tune with the Lord, then you may be looking for movies like All Things New.
In Summer 2008, The Philippines witnessed the birth of the new era of Philippine Entertainment via Ploning. And today, Christian production outfit Good News Productions International is unveiling a premiere screening of its maiden project, All Things New.
What is great about All Things New is not only the fact that it is a movie that awakens us to the realities of our country; it also awakens us to the fact that MIRACLES HAPPEN on a daily basis ON THIS SIDE OF HEAVEN. All Things New is also a testament to the redemptive power of Christ's cross.
I know for a fact that Christ's cross has changed millions of lives through the 2,000 years since the moment He's risen. This movie, All Things New, seeks to capture exactly the miracle of the radically changed life of the individual.
Over and beyond the changed lives, what is so important about the December 5 and 6, 2008 screenings of All Things New is that it allows YOU to partner in changing a life or two.
Thanks to your purchase of a ticket and watching these VIP screening/s, you will be able to help fund the outreach projects of CBN Asia, World Vision, Compassion Philippines, Christians’ Haven, Every Nation Campus Ministries, Real Life Foundation, CCF Backstreet Kids, and Jesus Revolution, in their quest to help uplift the lives of street children.
After working grueling and crazy 14 to 16-hour workdays in the weeks past, and not really accomplishing much because of the extreme stress I was experiencing, I finally decided to take a break last Sunday, November 23. Thankfully, great best budz Monalisa and Kitchie were kind enough to give in to my request of a hang-out in UP Diliman and have lunch at Mang Jimmy's, a famed favorite hangout in UP, famous for the amazing Sisig, and other cheap, but great-tasting food.
After going to Mass (it was an educational experience, setting foot in a Catholic Mass once more. :p), we promptly headed on to the Shopping Center in order to get batteries for Lis' camera. Alas, and alack, we were out of luck for the cam (ehem; pardon the rhyme)... BUT... We found...
Inggat!!!
Thanks to Inggat, we were able to find Mang Jimmy's much faster than if we just bumped around on UP's sprawling campus. I fully admit, that had Inggat not been providently placed across our paths, my best friends Lis and Kitch would now be my worst enemies, coz I hadn't gone to Mang Jimmy's on my own before, ever. Especially since Lis was way hungry by then. Heheh. :D
Inggat was a wonderful Tau addition to our all-Grav company of three. With her around, the laughters were more gleeful, and the meal in Mang Jimmy's, buttery pusit and bangus, amazing Sisig and Tapa Mix, were all the more delectable.
Mang Jimmy's is almost like a hole-in-the wall resto. The food, especially the Sisig and Tapa Mix, were more than worth their price tag. And though the seafoods' sauce was much too salty for me, the taste was passable.
If you're looking for a decent restaurant with decent surroundings, don't expect it from Mang Jimmy's. The rugged Carinderia-like environment is part of Mang Jimmy's charm. Though I'm a Sisig Hooray fan forever, if you want a calm meal with friends, family, or a special someone, and Sinful SISIG, Mang Jimmy's is the place to go to. Their Sisig is among the best I've tasted; next to Sisig Hooray, I think Mang Jimmy's ties with Iloilo's Breakthrough's Sisig, in my list. :p
To get there, you have to pass by a side road off of Vinzon's hall, Shuster Street. Go straight, cross the main road of Katipunan, go inside the gated path leading to a park/reservoir, where a Manila Water building greets you, head straight, turn towards the left road from the junction, and there's a Mang Jimmy's sign that indicates that you're there already.
I recalled Shuster street, because I was blabbering on like the Energizer Bunny who had a bad case of talkativeness mixed in with the lethal combination of not having seen another being of its kind in ages, and Lis was telling me to "Shush," and we found "Shuster Street." Heheh. :p Good for y'all who want to get to Mang Jimmy's. At least here are more specific directions now. :p
It's really just a residential place that was converted to a resto.
After the meal filled with laughter, we left Mang Jimmy's giggling about a woman who looked eerily like Michael V. (eek). Then we went to take pictures on UP's grounds, had more laughs, bade goodbye to Inggat, and under compulsion, I went with Lis and Kitch to Megamall. I figured it was time to see my Victory Pioneer fam again anyway. :p
I then spent the afternoon with Lis around a Megamall bazaar, then going to church in Victory Pioneer, and coming home at past midnight coz the pplz were so fun and I missed them much. :p Thanx Ate Sam, Ate Ming, Beda, Mary, Keith and the new guy kabarkadas that I've met that night!
Moral of the story: Don't work too hard, make sure Sundays are enjoyable SABBATHS, and give priority to relationships. Money could only give you so much. In fact, it gives more headache than anything. :p
From that point on, I made a decision to have low-tech Sundays: only my iPod and cellphone are allowed for a few hours (Gawrsh. I need rehab for blogging/the Internets. :p), then I'd just have fun all Sunday long. NO WORK FOR 24 HOURS!!! (Unless "work" means just blogging. :p)
I guess this means one thing. I have to make it a point to touch base with people that I love, on the real-interaction realm, at least once a week. Whether it's just in UP Diliman, or I find myself in Victory Pioneer again, I should make it a priority to keep the relationships in my life alive.
I'm not yet ready to go home to Iloilo, that's for sure, but I'm now making it a point to make sure that my life isn't all about acquiring money. It should be more about enriching my relationships.
When God tries to leach issues out of us, it could be likened to trying to press pus out of a pimple...
And the more impacted the pimple, the more painful it is to press pus out of it; but there is greater relief that is experienced the moment pus DOES get popped out.
I had been inspired to write the previous blog entry because I had been thinking about Reinabelle Reyes for two nights now. When I had asked Lis, coz she was friends with a Pisay Dil batchmate (whom I never got to meet) about Reina, I decided to Google "Reinabelle Reyes" in order to find out what she was up to nowadays.
I was happily surprised to know that she made world news, as she and her team in Princeton discovered how common Quasars are.
Though, in my journey as a Christian, I had sworn off planetary sciences because people are more important than stars, something, in one of my visions, had been related to black holes. And seeing that MY BATCHMATE, MY BATCH'S VALEDICTORIAN actually discovered and understood how common Quasars are, and gave a new level of understanding as to how black holes operate, I... Was mutedly shocked... And though not totally surprised, coz I already had clues about finding out, because I had impressions of Reina and I had that vision with the "stellar" significance I was... Bowled over with the fact that God had used a batchmate of mine, someone in close proximity in my history of people I've come into close contact with, to confirm that vision.
After that mild shock, I was happily distracted with talking to Derek, talking to Lis, writing the other blog post, Talking to Gigi, and now I'm here, letting you know that hey, a Pisay scholar discovered Something Significant in Astronomy! One more reason to keep the Pisay budget alive, Philippine Government! See, there is fruit to the crazy Imeldific legislation, after all!
I am proud of Reinabelle Reyes-Coronado. I am happy that she had put our country on the Worlwide Map. I am happy that she gives our Senate one more reason to keep Pisay alive.
She and Ma'am Josette Biyo are beautiful stars in the annals of fame in Pisay. I would like to give them honor and I would like to give God praise for putting women who blazed trails for Philippines and Pisay.
Who would have known that mysterious, introverted, thought-immersed Reina would someday do this? Who would have known that quirky, funny Ma'am Biyo (with whom I've had only one close encounter with, but it gave me a good glimpse into what a fun person she actually is) would someday have a PLANET named after her? No one but God. :D
I am glad to be part of the school that gave birth to great men and women. I am glad to be part of a family who, above the intellectualism and whatever, continue to go back to the one thing that matters in being in Pisay: EXCELLENCE.
Reina, thank you for being. Thank you for your humble pursuit of excellence. Congratulations for this feat, and may God bless you, keep your marriage in the palm of His hands, and keep your heart afire for excellence, and your passion for scholarship..
He did say in Daniel:
Daniel 2:20-21 (New International Version) “Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are his. He changes times and seasons; he sets up kings and deposes them. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning.
Daniel 2:20-21 (New Living Translation)
“Praise the name of God forever and ever, for he has all wisdom and power. He controls the course of world events; he removes kings and sets up other kings. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the scholars.
Daniel 2:20-21 (New American Standard Bible)
Daniel said, "Let the name of God be blessed forever and ever, for wisdom and power belong to Him. "It is He who changes the times and the epochs; He removes kings and establishes kings; He gives wisdom to wise men and knowledge to men of understanding."
Daniel 12:3 (NIV) Those who are wise [Or who impart wisdom] will shine like the brightness of the heavens, and those who lead many to righteousness, like the stars for ever and ever.
Again, congrats, Reina, and may you be gifted with more wisdom, understanding, and a greater appreciation for the God who created this universe!
For those of you who never knew, I am from Pisay. It is the Philippines' premier high school, and we get paid to break our brains.
I broke my brain and my heart in Pisay. So many things happened to me that the pain still echoes dimly. If ever there was a part of my heart that had had an open door to rejection, it was increased in Pisay Diliman; because Manila high schools had a social structure much like the Heathers. Pisay was a milder version, because we were preoccupied with remaining in school; if we had grades lower than 2.5 or around 75% to 80%, we were in danger of being hauled off to the Guidance Office.
Pisay broke my ego; as a young achiever in elementary, I was hailed as a "genius" by my classmates in SPED. It was already a a school for fast-learning children, but for the first few years of my life there, I never left the top 3. I was even #1 for the first two years.
And even as I plummeted from #1 to #7, graduating 5th Honorable Mention (#7, coz you still need to count the Valedictorian, Salutatorian, then go to 1st to whatever Honorable Mention), my classmates and their parents still hailed me as the smartest kid on the block...
But Pisay broke my ego.
When I was swimming in the pool of the Philippines' intellectual crèmè de la crèmè, I lost my identity as "the smartest one"... For how could you stand out from the crowd of "the best"?? I lost a sense of who I was, among people hailed to be better than I am.
Among future scientists, doctors, physicists, top vets, I was just me, manic-depressive Lorie, who slept in Physics Lab floors and Earth Sci class, on top of the counters and tables, as my teachers droned on and on.
I loved the sciences as a child. I was 8 when I got my first microscope and I loved looking at pretty slides of microscopic flowers and... Pond water. I loved decapitating ants and squishing roaches. I wouldn't touch lizards nor rats though. Anything that looked like it had a brain is off-limits to me. I killed all insects I came across, and played with their poor bodies to death, save for spiders. I felt like they had brains too. I'd torture Daddy Longlegs, though. I'd split their bodies apart and let them walk on just a leg or two.
I'd read my Grade 4 science books and be able to recite pages from memory. I won a class contest, Boys vs. Girls, single-handedly, on the Skeletal system, with minimal participation from my teammates.
That incident sparked the Boys to study harder and cream us all, when I got cocky on the Muscular System.. Hey, as far as I'm concerned, the Gluteus Maximus is the only memorable muscle. Pardon the Freudianity of it all.
Then came high school. All the flurry of geniuses, teachers that didn't know what on earth they were teaching, teachers that KNEW what they were teaching (Thanks Sir Bimbo Marte! Thanks Ma'am Arre!), lessons that broke my brain, realizing that I am "not good enough" to be a part of this lot of gifted people...
It got me lost.
No more the identity of being the best. No more the understanding that I am special. I was just pathetic obese ol me who could not survive Biology or CHEM. So after a year of sleeping in classes, on countertops, and on Physics lab floors, I went home to Iloilo.
Pisay Iloilo gave me the acceptance I needed. From the hostile "Heathers" like milieu in Pisay Dil, I got the family I needed in Pisay.
Incidents like my mom rushing to give me my lab coat amidst our incessant fights, hours of counseling with my Chem teachers (Thanks Ma'am Paciente!), mercy from Sir Ongcol for finally letting me pass Chem in order to graduate, getting that first flat 1.0 on an essay on the Jewish Holocaust from Sir Cerbo, being mentored by Ma'am YZ, Sir Barre and Sir Siena, hours of talking with Ma'am Val Gerochi, Ma'am Eileen Ocampo, challenging Ma'am Barlas as to the importance of stupid Algebra and Trigonometry (Then realizing today that I can apply Calculus' concepts of permutations and Algebra's one to one correspondence.. Or is it Geometry? In my job in WRITING for a certain software...), the three Filipino Beauties: Ma'am Sunico, Ma'am Silario, Ma'am Sinfuego, Ma'am Guiloreza with whom I share my faith in God, Sir Cario who taught me that I could be good in Turbo Pascal after all, Sir Quiros, who tutored me for a while, Sir Redoblo, whose guts I hated (haha we can laugh at this now, Sir, when you read this, if ever, hahaha!), hours hanging out in "Tita Becky" (Director Rebecca Yandog)'s office, Sir Lando Libutaque and Sir Pacaco of hated and dreaded P.E. (but I loved Health class. :p), Ma'am Cuenca, Ma'am Mena-Navarro, Ma'am Magno, Sir Cadornigara (whose beautiful shiny head is sooo memorable), Sir Olvido (Who thought I'd join Greenpeace; nu-uuuh! BTW, that talk with your bro is probably one of the most memorable moments in my existence.), Sir Almero, Ma'am Salinel... You guys really made me feel loved, despite my messiness. One conversation with Ma'am Salinel was very healing for me: she told me that she was warned by my other teachers about me: I was demanding and I was sooo hungry for knowledge, but hard to please; but whose comment that I was actually a nice student really helped me understand that my teachers actually thought highly of me...
These people in Pisay Iloilo helped me understand who I was more; they helped me feel accepted. And while I still go blank at the thought of possibly needing to study the Periodic Table of Elements in the future, knowing how to comprehend HTML and CSS now gives me confidence that I can "do all things through Christ who strenghtens me."
Pisay Dil, despite the fact that the only memories that remain are those of my classmates in Diamond, some of my dormmates, the ACTS facilitators and Ma'am Taruc, who was a gentle presence in the dorm, the quirky teachers, the mataray but lovable dorm manager Ma'am Daniel, and her motherly co-manager (I forgot the name), Computron and Sacha Chua, the beautiful Saturday afternoons in the campus, as well as the misadventures, will always be a major part of my growth. Even through the pain and angst of adolescence, the rude awakening to social systems that were hostile to my sensitive heart, these memories remain poignant and fond. Pisay will always be a part of my makeup.
Pisay Iloilo is always going to be my family. With Graviton being so bonded because we were driven to excel in the class plays we presented, with the fact that we were constantly told that we are so-united that we needed to resort to having that "lunch buddy" program... Look where we are now, guys! We're one big happy family with our own reunions! There is mutual respect and love. And we... Beat what they said about us. We are still here. We are still going strong. And we are the bestest buddies of each other!!!
And lastly, it's funny how God orchestrates families. I never knew it would be so uncanny as the way He created this... But my bestest bestest buddy, my best friend non-parallèle, is.......
FROM PISAY.
Throughout the angst, the pain, and everything, I now understand that it wasn't Pisay which brought me pain; Pisay was a place that God had brought me to, in order to experience a lot of things; be taught a lot of lessons, and understand one thing: Love knows no boundaries. It is not bounded by negative things said to us, in terms of Graviton being blahblahblah. Love is not bounded by the evil experiences we had gone through. Love is not bounded by the things we needed to overcome. It is not bounded by batches, by campuses, God brings people together in order to love Him and love each other anyway.
Diamond 01 people, thank you. Your acceptance has really helped me overcome some things I had gone through. Thank you that despite my messiness, I was, and still am, a friend to some. Thank you also to those I had befriended apart from Diamond: to Jaja Campos, with whom I had shared a lot, including hosting, and my first shot at an online presence, haha! To Connet, now a comrade in the work-at-home biz, to Celina (Papic), Michelle, and Reina, whose excellence inspired me... To Derek, for your forgiveness and friendship; for caring. To MK, Michelle and Rachel, who were good roommates to me, and to KC, who has forgiven me despite the fact that I was mean to her.
And mostly, I am thankful for Vanek. For that moment in a coffee house in UPLB. For stepping out in faith and inviting me to Victory UPLB. Without you, I won't be standing here today, poised to go to church to Victory QC tomorrow. I would like to give you my profuse thanks, and the honor that you deserve as the woman who helped close the deal in my journey to God's arms.
I am thankful I have my Graviton family, from whence my bestest friends come. I am thankful for Jaja, for bringing us together via Grav Yahoo Groups... I am thankful for Kitchie and Monalisa, who provide instant company and instant sanity-in-a-box in this Anomic metro, I am thankful for Pam, who is lost in all the crazy med work. I am thankful for Thessa, who taught me that friendships could happen between "the weird girl" and the "popular girl". For Hedy, who taught me that I could still be forgiven. For the people I have not named, who had been a source of friendship nonetheless.. For Rafi, who was instrumental in letting me get published in Central Echo and in securing my partnership with Shelly. For Ervin, who took a chance in trusting me; thank you for the respect and the trust. You are a cherished presence in my life. And for Paula, who taught me the value of loving a person despite her PMS... And mine. :p
Thank you all, for passing through my life, and thank you more for those who remain.
But most of all, I am thankful for Gigi, whose presence in my life was sanity-inducing, despite what we had individually gone through.
Even through the miles, even through what we had to overcome, even through the obstacles that kept us from being nice to each other at times, thank you for loving me with whatever you could manage before. Thank you for the better-than-buttercaramel-ice-cream moment over Skype today. It sure healed me.
This is my Pisay story. From pain and angst, from the journey of losing my so-called identity as the so-called "smart girl," from finding, losing and finding the love of learning once more, my Pisay experience gifted with a big basket of love and happy people who love me and I have a chance to love. For friendships that lasted, even through discouragements. For friendships that go beyond the hair and skin care advice; for spiritual sisterhood that has lasted through turmoil and strife... And journeyed on to healing.
I praise God for using my educational heritage and weaving it to become part of my spiritual heritage...
And hey, Jaja and Gigi just told me that it's Thanksgiving next week. This is pretty timely, then. :D Thanks, everyone! I love you all!!!
Be careful little eyes what you see It's the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the strings Be careful little feet where you go For it's the little feet behind you that are sure to follow
It's a slow fade when you give yourself away It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid When you give yourself away People never crumble in a day It's a slow fade, it's a slow fade
Be careful little ears what you hear When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near Be careful little lips what you say For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray
It's a slow fade when you give yourself away It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid When you give yourself away People never crumble in a day
The journey from your mind to your hands Is shorter than you're thinking Be careful if you think you stand You just might be sinking
It's a slow fade when you give yourself away It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid When you give yourself away People never crumble in a day Daddies never crumble in a day Families never crumble in a day
Oh be careful little eyes what see Oh be careful little eyes what you see For the Father up above is looking down in love Oh be careful little eyes what you see
Saw this from Gigi's Friendster, and I thought to repost... I believe that we are in a season when fathers return to their families and husbands and wives understand what is more important. If there's anything that ripped the fabric of America's society apart, it's the permissiveness with which they had allowed godless thinking to pervade their shores.
On one hand, it seems like they have it all bad, on the other hand, here in our shores we also battle a different enemy: religiosity. We tend to embrace dogma over the heart of what Jesus preaches... I'm guilty of legalism myself, and it's a daily battle and submission to the Lord of my heart.
I choose sanity. I choose to be faithful to Him, and to the one I had given my human heart to. I choose to submit my relationships to Him and to ask Him to fool-proof these and to keep these in the palm of His hands. I choose to trust: to see things as He sees them, and to keep believing that I see Him because my heart had been purified, and He finds me blameless.
I choose to listen to the voice of my Shepherd, and not the voice of the crowd (Matthew 9:25), I choose to not allow myself to be condemned, because my Father in heaven has said: "Has anyone condemned you? Go and sin no more."
I may stumble, I may fall, but I will not be moved, because the Man/God who is more than a Good Samaritan keeps picking me up. I am thankful for His grace in my life. I am thankful that He keeps His promises. I am thankful that He is called Faithful and True. :)
He is the Love of my life, my GOD, my Savior, my Jesus Christ.
